Friday, October 06, 2006

The Packet - and the PM's adoption.

Alright, so we don't actually have any tasks in the bag. I may be a blogger, disc golfer, baseball fan, and map geek by night, but during the day I'm supposed to be a project manager. So, at some point, you can guarantee I'll create a a cost estimate, a task list, a timeline, and then a punch list and a set of risk items. But, we're not even far enough for any of that stuff. We're in what I would call the evaluation phase. We know we're going to do this, we just don't know exactly how, when, or who. So what tasks are in the bag.

Probably the biggest step so far was the fact that Melissa is no longer working. She left her position as a Child Care Center Director largely to concentrate on the whole process of adoption. It might seem like we're getting ahead of ourselves, but there will be lot's of work to do to to prepare the house for a family. We also might taking in foster kids for a period of time. The state will have a lot to say about the environment, and the adoption agency will be performing some home inspections. This will also give us some time to adjust our own living styles to a single income.

As I mentioned before, we've done a fair amount of online research. Of course, we've also talked about the concept of adoption with various friends and family off and on in recent years. One of the most well known adoption agencies,
  • Bethany Christian Services
  • has come up a number of times in web links, recomendations from friends, and the like.

    So, we spent some time (both together and separately) checking out their web site. Then Melissa sent in a request for an information packet with initial application forms. I was concerned that the packet would be a giant re-hash of the web site. And since I hate wasting time, I was not looking forward to reviewing the packet. As it turns out, there was actually very little repeated info.

    The packet included very detailed descriptions about the various international adoptions, as well as the requirements for who can and cannot adopt. Continuing with my obsession with creating lists, here are a couple of first impressions.

    -There are really no major financial requirements. You need not be filthy rich to adopt, nor do you need a hundred grand in the bank. Yah, it can get expensive, but there are so many fincancing options out there, that pretty much anyone with a stable job and reasonable amount of debt would be eligible. After reviewing the numbers, I'd say that the monetary difference would be between financing a new or late model car vs. buying a just basic transportation. There are loans, grants, and tax credits for the taking.

    -There's a ton of variety amongst the foreign adoption methods. Some countries require a 3 month stay and 10's of thousands of dollars in fees. Others require only 1500 bucks and a trip to the local airport to meet your adpoted child.

    -Now for a surprise. Bethany documentation uses some FAQs and suggested reasons why a couple might want to adopt. But the packet also includes a list of the "wrong reasons to adopt." Among them:
    --We will be doing the poor child a favor
    --Having a baby to love will make me feel completed and loved

    There are some others as well, but those 2 stuck me as odd. I mean - no, those are not exactly the reasons why we are adopting. I'm a somewhat spiritual person, so I believe God want's to adopt (no I don't hear voices, it's just a gut feeling). But anyway, if that's the case, then I must determine why it is that God wants us to adopt. Well, I'm hoping it's largely because I have much love to give, and we have the means to provide a good home for a child. Presumably, the life we could provide would be better in certain ways than it would otherwise for that child. Isnt' that really a nice way of saying we'd be doing the poor child a favor? And besides, what's so wrong with doing favors for poor children? I don't get it.

    And isn't it true that having a baby to love will be fulfilling for Melissa and me? Ya, I know, adoption isn't a selfish endeavor, but if we go around pretending it won't be rewarding, we'd be develop fairly large noses - although this would be more noticeable on Melissa because her's is fairly average in size, while mine is rather prominant.

    Anyway, much more to comment about "The Packet" later on.


    At 11:37 AM, Anonymous EAB said...

    "but there will be lot's of work to do to prepare the house for a family"
    ...sounds like the perfect excuse to get that new 42" plasma!!

    At 11:49 PM, Blogger GDS said...

    Hmm, perhaps I should sneak that into the budget!!!

    At 11:09 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

    Make sure i is HD


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